• An Ordinary Mother

Love or Loathe: Gender Reveals?

In 2008, Jenna Jarvunidis baked a cake to celebrate the upcoming birth of her first child. “For me, it was a milestone,” she told The Guardian. 'I had had several miscarriages. It was like, ‘Oh, yay, I’m finally at a point in my pregnancy where I know if it’s a boy or a girl'.

When the cake was cut, it revealed pink icing, letting friends and family know that a girl was on the way. This is an all-too-familiar image now. And of course they have become even more creative.

Not to mention the fact they sometimes go wrong!

Nevertheless, 10 years on, Karvunidis is rethinking so-called gender reveals, largely due to her daughter. She had this to say on her social media:

I've felt a lot of mixed feelings about my random contribution to the culture. It just exploded into crazy after that. Literally - guns firing, forest fires, more emphasis on gender than has ever been necessary for a baby.

Who cares what gender the baby is? I did at the time because we didn't live in 2019 and didn't know what we know now - that assigning focus on gender at birth leaves out so much of their potential and talents that have nothing to do with what's between their legs.

PLOT TWIST, the world's first gender-reveal party baby is a girl who wears suits!

Despite this change of heart, Karvunidis' original excitement about being far along enough to know the gender of her baby is not to be dismissed. Milestones in pregnancy provide reassurance and excitement for parents, and it is totally up to you what you choose to share on your social media. The 20 week scan in the UK is usually the opportunity for parents to get a very good indication of the gender, but it is primarily about checking that the baby is healthy. You may not wish to share just another scan photo to celebrate a positive scan, and so sharing the gender in a creative way may be much more interesting and exciting for your friends and family - if you choose to find out the gender or course.

For some people, they are just pleased about having a healthy baby, and the gender is unimportant. That is why so many people choose not to find out the gender at all until the birth. Other find out, feeling it will help them prepare with clothing etc, but do not tell anyone. And others shout every single detail from the rooftops.

And Karvunidis doesn't want to make other excited parents feel bad about throwing a reveal—although generally speaking, she would love if people shifted away from gender reveal parties. "Parents get enough flak for every move they make as it is. I just urge people to pivot to a pregnancy reveal," she told BuzzFeed. "It can happen sooner, and everyone still gets cake."

Of course, it's not just gender reveals which have become more creative. The indiscriminate 12 week scan photo have led to people being more creative with pregnancy reveals too. If you do decide to to announce a pregnancy in a creative way on social media, you may find this video helpful for inspiration:

However, nothing will ever beat seeing those you love having that first reaction to the news:

Whether you love or loathe gender reveals, or whether you agree with announcing any aspect on social media, it is important to accept we all have different priorities and feelings. Celebrate as you see fit and enjoy every moment!

What are your feelings on gender reveals, or indeed your thoughts about using social media for any pregnancy updates? Comment below.

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